Wrestling in Costco

I MUST go to Costco. "Mom, why do we have to go to the store? It's BOOORRRINNNGG!" says the eldest from the back. I stop to get gas and in the 2 minutes I am out of the car, Brother Wars edition #7349 erupts in the back to the soundtrack of shrieking mad baby. The wall of sound and accusations attack me as I get back in the car and attempt to even decipher "who dunnit". Scrambled spaghetti of kicking, little-brother-annoying-repetition, hitting-him-because-he's-annoying, it's-your-fault noise. Sigh.

I briefly consider flying home and placing them in separate bedrooms while I have a cup of tea. Hmmmm...nope. I'm already here. And we NEED groceries. So, we will do this and we will survive. I hope. "No fighting. No running away from mommy. Are we clear?" "Yes mommy!"  We'll see.

1 minute and "Mom look can we get some candy?" Blast! Why do they put the gigantic bowl of candy at eye level right within the front entrance in order to entice to a new credit card? No! "Mom can we have some if we are good while we are here?" The negotiator. "Can we have some jelly beans?" Actually, yes because we are still trying to convince D that the toilet is better than his pants or his bed. "OOOOH! Samples! Mom can we have some?" And so on. "Can I get this? Can we get some of that? Mom, we NEED this!" C is in his well-trained-western-world-consumer mode. Lord, how will we ever teach balance and sharing with those who are less fortunate and loving the intangible treasures of family, health, hope, peace? I am feeling the stretch between the two poles myself as I make myself walk by the urge to stock up on everything.

"OOOHHH!! Potato chips! Mom can we get those?" So now the inner litany of trying to balance a healthy diet and yet some "fun" foods starts up. I have 3 boys. I KNOW my grocery bill is only going to grow and grow and I want them to avoid the pitfalls of filling up on empty calories and mistaking bright packaging for a valid food source. No potato chips! Doritos samples at the end of the aisle. Bright orange powder to add to the traces of Nutella still on D's face and hands. Perfect. Brownie samples in the next aisle. I could use some chocolate too. And coffee and biscotti in the next. Yogurt, chicken, shrimp etc.

We turn the corner and run into my chiropractor with her two well behaved little girls. Her eldest and my eldest eye each other realizing the potential for a playmate. D decides this is a prime time to turn on his athletic acrobatic skills and tumble around me, the cart, run down to the end of the aisle and back. Her youngest daughter just watches in fascination. Sigh. I try to contain the whirlwind and finally give up and start initiating races down to the end of the aisles that I am in.

Almost done! Coming out of the fresh fruit section we are ambushed by the amazing little wooden-playhouse-of-every-child's-dreams. "MOM!!MOM!!Look! Look!" And now I have to wait while they explore and talk to me through the window. On the plus side, they are happy and excited. Then we move across the aisle to climb all over the display couch. Shoes off!! Another five mins of toe tapping.

Finally we are in line to check out. Baby is quiet and sleepy. Big boys decide to have a full on wrestling match. On the cold concrete floor. In front of everyone. To the point where they both start getting flushed cheeks and a little sweaty. Laughing and having fun though. And thankfully no one decide to open up their skulls on the ground today. Wow. I need to lay down. But that will have to wait until after making dinner and bedtime.

Bottom line: We managed to get through Costco with most of the things we needed. The boys played and ran and wrestled. No one got hurt. And they were not parked in front of the TV for at least 2 hours. I'd say that was a win.

PS: After checking out, the boys went into the men's bathroom by themselves ( while I stood anxiously outside and kept a running conversation with them while scrutinizing all the men who came in and out of there. It would be easier if I was the same gender but they object to going into the ladies room with me now.) and went potty and washed their hands. (C is 6 1/2 and D is 3) They are always surprising me. Love them.